Things to do with ashes
It’s okay if you don’t want to keep cremated remains anymore.
People end up with cremated remains for all kinds of reasons. Maybe you’ve kept them for years, inherited them, or simply reached a point where you’re ready to do something else.
Fortunately, you have options. They can be scattered, buried, placed somewhere permanent, incorporated into a memorial, transformed into something new, and more.
Burial of ashes
Buried in an urn plot, a cremation garden, or a grave the family already owns.
Local provider Learn moreCeramic memorials
Incorporated into pottery, sculpture, or other fired ceramic pieces.
Available by mail Learn moreColumbarium niches
Placed in a permanent niche, indoors or outdoors.
Local provider Learn moreMemorial art
Incorporated into paintings, portraits, resin pieces, or other artwork.
Can be done yourself Learn moreMemorial diamonds and jewelry
Turned into a memorial diamond or incorporated into keepsake jewelry.
Available by mail Learn moreMemorial glass
Blown or fused into glass objects such as orbs, hearts, or sculptures.
Available by mail Learn moreMemorial tattoos
Incorporated into tattoo ink for a memorial tattoo.
Can be done yourself Learn moreReef and coral memorials
Incorporated into a memorial structure placed in an ocean habitat.
Available by mail Learn moreScattering by aircraft
Released from an aircraft over a chosen location.
Local provider Learn moreScattering of ashes
Scattered in a meaningful place, subject to applicable rules and permissions.
Local provider Learn moreSolidified remains
Transformed into smooth, stone-like pieces that can be kept, shared, or placed somewhere meaningful.
Available by mail Learn moreSpace burial
Sent into space as part of a memorial flight.
Available by mail Learn moreTree & plant memorials
Used in a system designed to grow a tree, flowers, or another plant.
Available by mail Learn moreVinyl records
Pressed into a playable vinyl record.
Available by mail Learn moreDid we miss something?
If there’s an option you know about that isn’t here, we’d like to hear about it.
Let us know →Frequently Asked Questions
Will anyone judge me for not wanting to keep them?
No.
People end up holding cremated remains for all kinds of ordinary reasons. You inherited them. You bought a house or cleared a storage unit and they were already there. The person who wanted them has died too. A marriage ended. You have moved six times and they are still in the box.
Funeral homes, cemeteries and crematories hear from people in this situation all the time. You do not have to feel bad about asking.
I’m not next of kin. Can I still do something with the remains?
Possibly, but don’t guess.
Who has the legal right to make decisions about cremated remains varies by state and circumstance.
Tell the provider exactly how the remains came into your possession and what you know about the person. The provider can tell you what they are able to accept and whether they need authorization or documentation before moving forward.
You can still contact a funeral home or crematory, even if you do not know whether you have the legal authority to transfer the remains.
What if I don’t know whose remains they are?
Do not throw them away or make assumptions about who they belong to.
Photograph the container and anything attached to it, including labels, numbers, funeral home information, crematory information, or other identifying details.
Then contact a local funeral home or crematory, explain exactly how you found them, and ask whether they can help.
What if I found cremated remains in a house, storage unit, or other property?
Start by documenting what you found and where you found it.
If you do not know how the remains came to be there, or you are unsure whether you have authority to transfer them, talk with an appropriate local authority or licensed funeral professional before taking further action.
A local funeral home or crematory may be able to tell you who can help.
They died a long time ago. Is it too late?
No.
Cremated remains may stay with families for decades. Older containers can have less documentation, so tell the provider what you know and what you do not.
What if I don’t have a death certificate or other paperwork?
Start anyway.
Tell the provider what you have and what you do not. If there is a label, identification number, crematory name, funeral home name, or other information on the container, include it when you contact them.
The provider can tell you what else they require.
Can I mail cremated remains?
Sometimes.
The U.S. Postal Service is the carrier used to ship cremated remains in the United States. If a provider accepts remains by mail, confirm that with them first and follow the current shipping requirements.
I’m in a different state from the provider. Does that matter?
Sometimes.
Rules governing cremated remains vary by state, and providers must follow the requirements that apply where they operate.
Many providers can work with families in other states. Ask before sending anything.
I only have part of the remains. Can a provider still help?
Usually.
Families commonly divide cremated remains among relatives or keep a small portion in a keepsake. Tell the provider what you have and they can explain what options are available.
Can I keep some of the ashes?
Possibly.
If separating the remains is appropriate in your situation, a provider may be able to help. If you are uncertain who has authority over the remains, do not assume you should open or divide the container yourself.
Do I have to be there in person?
Usually not.
Some providers accept remains by mail, some arrange drop-off, and some can hold a short committal or other service if you would like to attend.
What happens after I give the remains to a provider?
It depends on what you and the provider agree to.
Before transferring the remains, ask exactly what will happen, where it will happen, approximately when it will happen, and what confirmation you will receive afterward.
What if I’m not ready to make a permanent decision?
Then don’t.
You can use RetURN.org to understand your options without committing to one. Before transferring the remains, make sure you understand whether the decision can be changed later.
Scattering and many other forms of final disposition cannot simply be undone.
Have another question?
View the full FAQ →